As the clock struck midnight, and October 30th became October 31st...I was detoxing harder than I ever have in my entire life. It was officially Halloween, and I felt like death. How appropriate.

Two weeks ago, I started bee venom therapy to kill off the lyme bacteria in my joints. You have to start extremely slow, and build up over time to avoid a serious reaction. Before we started, my doctor told me to go out and buy Benadryl, and get an Epi-pen. You have to have these things on hand, as you can develop an anaphylactic allergy at any moment. Gulp.

My doctor did a small first test shot on my left forearm. Not a joint, but just to see how my body handled it. I was nervous, but it didn’t hurt as bad as I thought! It was literally just like a bee sting. My arm swelled up over the next 24 hours and became super hot and itchy. My doctor wasn’t concerned. It was normal, and we would begin injecting a few days later.

So on Tuesday, I came in and we started. The first appointment, he injected my knees. The second appointment, my elbows. Each time, the site would get hot and itchy the next day. But it passed quickly, and I was beginning to think this bee venom thing would be a piece of cake. At my third appointment on Friday, my doctor asked me which joints I wanted to do. My neck and spine have been hurting the most, so we decided to focus there. He injected me and I went home.

At 6pm, I had just finished cleaning the house and started making dinner. Suddenly, I started to feel really hot. I figured it was just from cooking close to the stove and the oven being on. But within a few hours, my head was on fire.

And by 11pm, I was in full blown agony. I had a fever, piercing headache, my eyes throbbed, my jaw hurt, my throat felt tight, my spine was in extreme pain, I was shaky, dizzy, and incredibly nauseous. I couldn’t sleep. I tried all my usual tricks. I drank a ton of water. I chugged activated charcoal, drank minerals, and downed electrolytes. I did a clay bath, rubbed peppermint oil all over my head, and did coffee enemas. Christopher even gave me an epic neck massage. But nothing was working.

I felt so awful, that I was scared. It was truly one eerie Halloween. I was in uncharted territory. I even wondered at one point if I needed to go to the hospital. I felt horrible, and just wanted it to be over. But as I was laying on a towel on the bathroom floor, it suddenly became clear. I didn’t need to go to the ER. I couldn’t get rid of this. I couldn’t make it stop. This was just going to take it’s course; and the only way out was through. It was all part of the experience, and the process was going to be difficult. Who knew how long it would last. I’m going to feel like shit. But that means I’m getting better. I needed to surrender.

Even though I still felt miserable, a peace settled over me. I was healing. The pain was the lyme transforming. And I had to die to butterfly.